There must be 5000 ways to die

and each one is the same way if you try

your friends all stand around while they dump you in the ground

and the people who loved you will ask why?

o why? o why? ooo why?

and the bastard you hated the most

will stand up and give you a toast

he'll say we were such good friends

especially near the end

and he'll feel up your girl friend in front of your ghost

so get in your car and drive real fast

up in the end with a shot gun blast

take a bath with a clock radio

vodka valium overdose

have you ever tried?

there must be 5000 ways to die

and if your very lucky

you'll get ur picture in the paper on page 3

25 words will sumerize how you spent your whole damn life

one day on that page

next day into the hamster cage(get it)

so get in your car and drive real fast

up in the end with a shot gun blast

take a bath with a clock radio

vodka valium overdose

all the glamour can be yours with an loaded 11-44

have you ever tried?

there must be 5000 ways to die