Baby I wanna tell you all my hopes and dreams and fears

But I'm watching television, could you get me another beer

There's wrestling and pro football on, I hope you understand

I must watch it all for I am a man



And a man has needs

And a man has desires

Eternal fires that burn, burn, burn

And a man he bleeds

And a man he perspires

'Til the stains show on his shirt



I missed our anniverary and the birth of our son

It was beyond my control, my team was on a playoff run

Oh baby, baby, baby, you mean everything to me

But could you move your butt, you're blocking the TV?



And a man has needs

And a man has desires

Eternal fires that burn, burn, burn

And a man he bleeds

And a man he does tire

Gets sleepy and naps on the couch



Oh baby, oh honey, oh darling, oh pudding, what are you doing with that suitcase? Leaving me? What do you mean we don't communicate? We're talking all the time. We're talk about-- Ooh! Monster trucks! That little Volkswagon ain't got no chance against The Cowcrusher! C'mon Cowcrusher, crush that little Volks-- you're gone. I hope she left me one of them pudding pops. They're tasty.



And a man has needs

And a man has desires

Eternal fires that burn, burn, burn

And a man he bleeds

And he shops at Canadian Tire

And he always keeps his coupons



And a man has needs

And a man has desires

Eternal fires that burn, burn, burn

And a man he bleeds

And a man he expires

And he cried when Wayne Gretzky retired