I don't wanna leave, Bernadette,

But I don't wanna live with the jet set.

I don't wanna leave with you payin' all my debts,

With that alimony, palimony, whatever it is you get.



Ooh, Bernadette, you are so expensive.

You've never done a day's work in your life,

You've got no incentive.

You've made a career out of punting off all of the men you've slept with.

Ooh, Bernadette, you are so expensive.



I can't get a job, Bernadette,

So all that I can offer are a lot of bad debts

If you marry me, Bernadette,

You'll lose the alimony, palimony, whatever it is you get.



Ooh, Bernadette, you are so expensive.

You've never done a day's work in your life,

You've got no incentive.

You've made a career out of punting off all of the men you've slept with.

Ooh, Bernadette, you are so expensive.

Ooh, Bernadette, Bernadette.

Ooh, Bernadette, Bernadette.



[Bernadette's got a house in the country,

She's really got it made.

Her lawyers made her filthy rich,

She's got all expenses paid.]



Maybe a famous rock star will fly you away,

Then you'll eat him all up,

And spit him out,

With a dash of Perrier.



And when you've had enough

You'll throw him away,

And take him for all you can get.

Yeah, you like it don't you, Bernadette?



I don't want to leave Bernadette,

But I wanna keep a little bit of self respect.

I don't want to leave with you paying all my debts,

With that alimony, palimony, whatever it is you get.

Ooh, Bernadette, you are so expensive.

You've never done a day's work in your life.

You've got no incentive.

Women like you oughta be locked up, -ac