Gonna buy me a steel umbrella

'Cause things ain't going too well

I go to bed thinking I'm in heaven

When I wake up I'm in hell

Take my dog for his morning walk

Shit am I glad he can't talk

Sooner or later it all comes back to me

You can bet on this If it can happen

It'll happen to me

(It'll happen to me)

Bet on this, if it can happen

Every time it happens

Why does it happen to me

Gonna buy me some more insurance

This asphalt surfin's getting to me

Accidents are an everyday occurrence

If there's a God, He's laughing at me

Might as well be the invisible man

See my footprints sinkin' in the quicksand

Sooner or later it all comes back to me

Bet on this

If it can happen

(It'll happen to me)

Bet on this, if it can happen

Everytime it happens

Why does it happen to me

Bet on this If it can happen

(Buy me a steel umbrella)

It'll happen to me

Bet on this

(No doubt in my mind)