I met him at a party and he told me how to drive him home

He said he liked to do it backwards

I said, "That's just fine with me,

That way we can fuck and watch TV."



It was four a.m. and the light was gray, like it always is in paperbacks

He asked if I liked playing jacks

I told him that I was good to sixes

But all hell broke loose after that



I told him that I knew Julia Roberts when I was twelve at summer camp

We didn't say anything after that

I dropped him off and I drove on home

'Cause secretly I'm timid