On a dark Tuesday evening sitting in my lair

Warm smell of zuchinnis rising up through the air

Downstairs in the kitchen I heard the clanging wok

My palms grew sweaty and I peed my pants

It was almost 6 o'clock



There I stood in the bathroom

I heard the dinner bell

And I was wondering to myself

If I was in some kind of stir fry hell

Then I got up the courage and I got me a plate

There were people screwing in the room next door

Looks like they would be late



Welcome to the Coop California

Such a messy place (such a messy place)

Plenty of food at the Coop California

Every kind of bean that you've ever seen



The agenda items were listed, it was an open forum

There were a lot of people in the house, but we couldn't get quorum

But we still called it a meeting, we didn't abort

Each officer took their turn giving a 30-minute report



So I called up to NASCO

Hey we're in a bind

And they said you haven't paid your member fees since 1989

And still that refrigrator is smellin from far away

Oh man I just can't wait

For work holiday...



Welcome to the Co-op California

Such a messy place (such a messy place)

Plenty of food at the Co-op California

What a nice surprise it's beans and rice!



All of a sudden it hit me, I got a weird sensation

And I said We are all just prisoners here of cooperation

And in the house accounting

The treasurer had been slack

They disconnected our electricity

And we just couldn't get it back



Last thing I remember I was feeling pretty lame

I put on my second wool sweater

And started to complain

Relax said my housemate

Sure this place is a mess

The food is bland and the bills unpaid

But we've still got house incest