these things which i so often wonder

this need to create myself

frustration forgotten through slumber

it's there when i wake

defeated before i rise

i'd pull myself out of his mire

if i could collect my strength

or muster an ounce of desire

finding the words and making them mine



is there somewhere

i could seperate this feeling from memory

disconnect myself from me



desire inside to mistreat you

it pushes words out of my mouth

this cyclical pattern i feed you

the back and forth and up and down

but still here you are



behind this veil of pious revelation

i'll close my eyes and look for worth inside

i don't deserve you



relinquishing hope for the future

i try not to hate it so

but you are a bridge to those memories

i try to forget if you only knew



is there somewhere to occupy emotion

a room to keep my rage away from you

just tell me when these hopeless days are over

i'll open my eyes and see my new sun rise

i don't deserve this


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