I am your neighbor. I seem most respectable,

But underneath I'm an iniquitous toad.

So many dreadful mishaps have befallen you

Down at the end of your road.



And I live down the end of your road.



I'm working on ways to remove you from paradise,

From your striped lawn and your new swimming pool.

I place broken bottles in your geraniums

Sabotage your gardening tools.



And I live down the end of your road.



By day I am a real estate gentleman:

I deal in fine properties, cheap at the price.

Under dark I plan my most devious practices which

You might not think very nice.



Designing a system to reverse your plumbing

Welling up as you sit on your private throne.

All kind of vile and despicable nasties

You would rather not have in your home.



And I live down the end of your road.



Dispensed loathsome creatures in your drawing room,

Sent doggy poo-poos in your morning mail.

Rat's heads and larks wings should set your tongues turning

And your houses will soon be for sale.



And I live down the end of your road.

Yes I live down the end of your road.

Well I live down the end of your road.

And I live down the end of your road.

Down at the end of your road.

Yes I live down the end of your road.

I live down at the end of your road.

I live down at the end of your road.