Eddie the eunuch was a weasel

Nasty as an old man's nose

Making believin' he was evil

Struttin' in his mama's clothes



You know that eddie had a bad connection

Never had a chance to ball

Sleeping in the wrong direction, baby

Dreaming he was ten feet tall



But now eddie the eunuch is a rock and roll critic

Sucking like a super star

Slicker than a shoe-shine

Quicker than a two-time

Eddie what a thang you are



Eddie makes a damn good livin', baby

Putting other people down

Eddie couldn't ever forgive them baby

'cause he wasn't jackson browne


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