FIFTY CENTS



I took my girl to a ball last night, 'twas such a fancy hop

We stayed until the folks went home, the music it did stop.

Then to a restaurant we went, the finest on the street

She said she wasn't hungry, but this is what she'd eat:



A dozen raw, a plate of slaw, some fancy Boston roast,

Some turtle stew, crackers, too, some soft-shelled crab on toast?

Next she tried some oysters fried; her appetite was immense!

She asked for pie! I thought I'd die, for I had but fifty cents!



After eating all of this she smiled so very sweet,

She said she'wasn't hungry at all, she wished that she could eat;

But the very next order that she gave, my heart within me sank.

She said she wasn't thirsty at all, but this is what she drank:



A brandy, a gin, a big hot rum, a schooner of lager beer,

Some whiskey skins and two more gins did quickly disappear;

A bottle of ale, a soda cocktail, she astonished all the gents!

She called for more, I fell on the floor, for I had but fifty cents.



To finish up, this delicate girl cleaned out an ice cream can?

She says, "Now, Sam, I'll tell mama you're such a nice young man."

She said she'd bring her sister along next time she came, for fun.

I handed the man my fifty cents, and this is what he done:



He broke my nose, he tore my clothes, he knocked me out of breath;

I took the prize for two black eyes, he kicked me most to death.

At every chance he made me dance, he fired me over the fence,

Take my advice: don't try it twice, when you have but fifty cents.



See also AINTJP

From Pious Friends, Shay

@food @money @courtship

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