He's big, fat, ugly, and mean

Too many beers and he's a shitting machine

Once he's drunk he likes to fight

Any fifteen year old in sight

Don't try to run, don't try to hide

He'll steal your car without thinking twice

Stop the party, hide your shit

Because Fat Randy's in the house tonight

High school parties are his thing

He drives up in his orange machine

He'll start fighting with his friends

Fat Randy gets you in the end

FAT RANDY snuck in my house

FAT RANDY shit on my couch

FAT RANDY quiet as a mouse

FAT RANDY!, FAT RANDY!

I see Fat Randy now and then

Driving around with a carload of friends

I see Fat Randy now and then

Driving around with a carload of friends