fat man slouched over the bench laughs at my transportation

every time i drive by him he fills with jubilation

he's laughing at my tires he's laughing at my horn

and the cards in my spokes

if i had time i'd tell him my story so he knows i'm not a hoax

like this:

my car is shot it hasn't moved an inch since 1995

so my friends and i did not have much you could

call a social life

we got sick of walking, sick of hitching, sick of taking hikes

so we didn't buy a car or a minivan -- we all bought bikes

geeks on bikes, geeks on bikes (ad nauseum)

i'm up at dawn to call my friends to relay the day's big plans

& before you know it our helmets are on

our gloves are on our hands

we drive down main to the dairy queen -- always in single file

and the fun piles up behind us yeah -- mile after mile

[chorus]

i always drive my bike safely with mirrors

and when it's dirty i was it with tears