Music/Text: John Merchant, Michael Holbrook Penniman (Mika), Jodi Muss

[spoken]
I wanna talk to you.
The last time we talked Mr. Smith you reduced me to tears.
But I promise you that won't happen again!

Do I attract you? Do I repulse you with my queasy smile?
Am I too dirty? Am I too flirty? Do I like what you like?
I could be wholesome I could be loathsome I guess I'm a little bit shy
Why don't you like me? Why don't you like me without making me try?

I try to be like Grace Kelly (Mmm mmm)
But all her looks were too sad (Ahh ahh)
So I try a little Freddie (Mmm mmm)
I've gone identity mad!

I could be brown, I could be blue, I could be violet like sky
I could be hurtful, I could be purple, I could be anything you like
Gotta be green, gotta be mean, gotta be everything more,
Why don't you like me? Why don't you like me? Why don't you walk out the door!

[spoken]
Getting angry doesn't solve anything

How can I help it, how can I help it, how can I help what you think?
Hello my baby hello my baby putting my life on the brink
Why don't you like me, why don't you like me, why don't you like yourself?
Should I bend over? Should I look older just to be put on your shelf?

I try to be like Grace Kelly (Mmm mmm)
But all her looks were too sad (Ahh ahh)
So I try a little Freddie (Mmm mmm)
I've gone identity mad!

I could be brown, I could be blue, I could be violet sky
I could be hurtful, I could be purple, I could be anything you like
Gotta be green, gotta be mean, gotta be everything more
Why don't you like me? Why don't you like me? Why don't you walk out the door!

Say what you want to satisfy yourself... hey
But you only want what everybody else says you should want
You want

I could be brown, I could be blue, I could be violet like sky
I could be hurtful, I could be purple, I could be anything you like
Gotta be green, gotta be mean, gotta be everything more, why don't you like me?
Why don't you like me? Why don't you like me? Walk out the door!

I could be brown, I could be blue, I could be violet like sky
I could be hurtful, I could be purple, I could be anything you like
Gotta be green, gotta be mean, gotta be everything more, why don't you like me?
Why don't you like me? Why don't you like me? Walk out the door!
Ooooooooooh ooh oooooooh waaa

[spoken]
Humphrey we're leaving
kachingaaaaa