When I was born, the doc he held me by my ankles

smacked my red behind.

They hosed me down, wrapped me like a bean burrito

then marked the date and time.



Hats off, to the ones that string the beads together

and keep the ducks in line.

Hats off to all the ones that stood before me

and taught a fool to rhyme.



At thirteen, I made myself a motion picture

out of lumps of clay.

At fourteen, I pulled some weeds and bought a four string

taught myself to play.

At seventeen, I'd get naked with a beauty queen

at the Hot Tub Zone.

At nineteen, she was livin' hard and snortin' drugs

that decayed her bones.



Hats off to the ones that put it all together

and keep their ducks in line.

Hats off to all the ones that erred before me

and taught me how to survive.