She'll have another piece of pie

She'll have a double reuben rye

She works hard at eating well

That's why I love her



She's got a couple of pony kegs

Her arms are bigger than my legs

And when she holds me I can't breathe

That's why I love her



I'm her butter she's my bread

She's like a mobile waterbed

And when I got on top of her

I can't touch the mattress



And when her flesh begins to sag

She's like a human sleeping bag

I feel so cozy, safe and warm

She's my insulation



I always know where she sat

And when she's on me I get flat

Some broken ribs a punctured lung

That's why I love her



She's my Phillie I'm her Stud

Her bean is bigger than my pud

It's like feeding a tic-tac to a whale

That's why I love her