(Calling all cars, calling all cars...)

(Be on the lookout for a tall light-skinned brother with dimples)

(Wearing a black kangol, sweatsuit, gold chain, and sneakers)

(Last seen on Farmers Boulevard headed east)

(Alias L.L. Cool J)

(He's bad...)

Aaaahhhhhhhhhh...



No rapper can rap quite like I can

I'll take a musclebound man and put his face in the sand

Not the last Mafioso I'm a MC cop

Make you say, "Go L.L. and do the wop"



If you think you can outrhyme me, yeah boy I bet

Cause I ain't met a motherfucker who can do that yet

Trendsetter I'm better my rhymes are good

I got a gourmet plate that says I wish you would



And when rap begin then I gotta join in and

Before my rhyme is over you know I'm a win

Cool J has arrived so you better make way

Ask anybody in the crowd they say the kid don't play!



Sparring competition that's my hobby and job

I don't wear a disguise because I don't own the mob

Got a pinpoint rap that makes you feel trapped

So many girls on my jock I think my phone here is tapped



I'm bad

(Cool J)

(Cool J)

(Cool J)

(C C C C Cool J J)

(Cool J)

(C C C C C C C Cool J J J J J)



I'm like Tyson icin' I'm a soldier at war

I'm makin' sure you don't try to battle me no more

Got concrete rhymes been rappin' for ten years and

Even when I'm braggin' I'm bein' sincere



MC's can't win I make 'em rust like tin

They call me Jaws my hat is like a shark's fin

Because I'm bad as can be got my voice all waxed

Some brothers think he's making records now he must have relaxed



I couldn't shouldn't and it'll stay that way

The best rapper you've heard is L.L.