Well, there once was a feller named Willard McVane

And he only had just one thought on his brain

Every evening about midnight he'd sneak off alone

And call the same lady on a pay telephone



'It's me again, Margaret...

(Evil laughter)

Hello, is this Margaret?

You don't know me, Margaret, but I know you.'



Well, this upset the lady and it gave her the blues

So she called up the police, said 'What shall I do?'

The chief of detectives came round to her home

And eavesdropped upon them on her upstairs phone



'It's me again, Margaret...

(Evil laughter)

Hello, is this Margaret?

Margaret, I know it's you, Margaret

Are you naked?

(More evil laughter)'



Well, they called up Ma Bell and they traced him on down

To a funky old phone booth on the outskirts of town

It was there that the vice squad with their field glasses read

The lips of that amorous man as he said



'It's me again, Margaret...

(Evil laughter)

Hello? Is this...is this Margaret?

(Evil laughter)

I know it's you, Margaret

I bet you can't guess what I'm doing...'



Well, they cuffed him and dragged him to the station downtown

And they allowed him one phone call 'fore the jailer came round

He wet his chapped lips and he cleared his young throat

Then he dialed the telephone and softly he spoke



'It's me again, Margaret...

(Evil laughter)

They got me, Margaret

You ain't going to miss me, Margaret, I know that

But I'll miss you

(More evil laughter)

And when I get out, Margaret

I'm going to come over there with an egg beater

And a live chicken, and some peach preserves!

We'll have a good old time, Marga