Leechwife:



YOU STUDY HARD AND GO WEST

YOU'LL GO FAR LITTLE GIRL

NOW TRY HARD, AND BE THE BEST

THE BEST IN ALL THE WORLD

YOU CAN CREATE ON DEMAND

FOR THIS YOUR SPECIAL SKILL

YOU WILL BE HEALING THE ILL

IT'S SURGERY, BUT WITH NO KNIFE

SHE'LL MAKE A GREAT LEECHWIFE



YOU GET THOSE SUCKERS TO SUCK

TO SUCK OUT WHAT'S BAD

'CAUSE THIS IS SCIENCE NOT LUCK

LUCK IS NOT WHAT YOU'VE HAD

BUT NOW YOU'VE BROUGHT YOURSELF UP

SURPRISE YOUR MOM AND DAD

WITH THIS, YOUR SPECIAL SKILL

YOU WILL BE IMPROVING YOUR LIFE

SHE'LL MAKE A GREAT LEECHWIFE



YOU DON'T NEED NO NU-AGE CRAP

GOOD SENSE IS WHAT IT MAKES

YOU'LL LEARN IT IN NO TIME FLAT

ONE LEECH IS AL IT TAKES

IT SUCKS THE BLOOD 'TIL IT'S FAT

IT'S FOUND IN PONDS AND LAKES

THE DRIED UP SKIN THEN TURNS BLACK

YOU CAN BE ONE OF THE FAKES

THE QUACKS AND THE RIFF-RAFF

SHE'S HONING HER LEECHCRAFT



ALL HEALED AND NONE KILLED

LEECH EMPTY, LEECH FILLED

SHE'S HONING HER LEECHCRAFT SKILLS

JUST THINK OF THE FOLKS SHE WILL HEAL

SHE'LL MAKE A GREAT LEECHWIFE