You'd already been half an hour with pre-clubbing shower and i'd always planned to have a look in your special winnie the pooh book. the place was marked and it was there in blue and white - it

Said simply, "paul stayed last night."



Next i was on the bog and you got down on one knee.

You were protesting your innocence and you started to cry as i started to pee.



You said, "i didn't shag him, he slept on the couch in the kitchen.

He might as well be a girl, he's a good for a laugh and he's good for bitchin'."



You said you'd never be willing or able.

And he looks like he was made on a fucking table.

Although, to be fair, i think he hides the bolts quite well, but as soon as he opens his mouth you can just tell.

I had just assumed you'd completely gone off shagging and i can you seen you with your new uni pals, standing bragging. now he's your boyfriend and i know you were talking shite but you still de

It when i met you at someone's birthday party the other night.



You said, "i didn't shag him, he slept on the couch in the kitchen. we have a good laugh when we're sitting bitchin'."



The words that you used to think turned me on just made me laugh - "do you want to suck my cunt?" in real life just sounds naff.

And when we were with your friends i just as well might of been no one.

And you can't get over your dead dog - well it takes one to know one.