Lost my cool at a brand new school

Where the kids all smelt kind of strange

And I threw my chair when I caught the teacher's glare

As she called me little Mary-Jane

All the ribbing that I god-damn took

From the kids left my ego in a whirl

And the kids would say while I sat and watched them play

Hey there kid are you a boy are a girl



Praise the day I'm old and grey

And don't look much like a girl

And the kids all come and dance in the streets

Proclaiming me the king of the world



Figured it'd be fine when I hit grade nine

And I'd grow a big beard really soon

Till the first day of gym when I met father tim

And he sent me to the girl's change room



Illustrate my weekly pass come across as feeling crass

Submit for credit or just share your thoughts

Search my archive for a joke a thousand drives and beers and hopes

Look out god I'm gonna die

My black candle won't stop smoking even though I blew it out

My stigmata are signs of disease

Reputation as the finest burnt your bridges to be sane

Look out god I'm gonna die



Now in the end I will surely transcend

All the things I was never meant to be

So with some skill and a little good will

Out on ladies night I'll get in bars for free