My mother's heart and soul

Have gone halfway up the pole

My father's on the dole

This is taking its toll

My friend Bert is much too old

And his dog's beyond control

Though it sometimes seems they're droll

It's a nuisance on the whole



I'm profoundly in love with Pandora

My poem has an intellectual theme

The tenderness with which I adore her

Goes all bouncy in my dreams



Yesterday my chin was clear

Now a new spot has appeared

Barry Kent had cost me dear

Till my Grandma interfered

The BBC know I'm sincere

In making writing my career

Wish my mum would come back here

Lots of ups and downs this year



I'm profoundly in love with Pandora

She's got knee-socks and treacle-coloured hair

The tenderness with which I adore her

Is something fine and rare



But, my father's in a mess

And there's a great deal of stress

At our house

And my major concern

Is that things might return

To normal

So get rid of that creep

And come back to sleep

In our house

We both miss you mum

So hurry up and come

Back home



My mother's heart and soul

Have gone halfway up the pole



Though it sometimes seems they're droll

It's a nuisance on the whole



Yesterday my chin was clear

Now a new spot has appeared

Profoundly in love with Pandora



Wish my mum would come back here

Lots of ups and downs this year



I'm profoundly in love with Pandora

Things aren't always what they seem

The tenderness with which I adore her

Is indeed a love supreme