There's one thousand seven hundred and forty-two

People in this little town

And that one proverbial horse

And everybody here'd be more than happy

To spread a little gossip 'round

If it ain't about them, of course

The bank's called in Bubba's note

The Higgins boy's done got on dope

And ol' man Dodd's been peeping through windows with a telescope

How can there be

CHORUS:

So many ripples in this tiny puddle

So many hearts tossed on this little storm

In a town this shallow

When you stur it you'll find trouble like

So many ripples in a tiny puddle

Last year the local mayor got caught

Doin' the breast stroke in the typin' pool

Now that's hands-on politics

And Bubba's land, the banker bought it cause he knew

That's where they're building the county school

He's gonna get rich again

And two seniors are havin' babies

Ain't no ifs, ands or maybes, cause

When you hear it from the Avon lady, its the gospel truth

How can there be

CHORUS

Bridge:

It's a tempest in a teapot

It's a roaring little mouse

We call it the Days of Our Lives on the rural route

CHORUS