If you wake up in the morning mean and grumpy

And you frown at ev'rybody that you see

If you like your oatmeal nice and cold and lumpy

Then you're a grouch like me



If you love it when it's wet and cold and raining

And the music that you like is all off key

If you're happiest whenever you're complaining

Then you're a grouch like me



If you hate it when your grandma kisses you

You know what? Well me, too!

If you love to see a garbage truck roll by

You know what? So do I!

And if you think a great big pile of trash is pretty

And that ice cream is yucchy as can be

If you can't stand a cuddly little kitty, then you're a grouch like me



If you hate it when your grandma kisses you

You know what? Well me, too!

If you love to see a garbage truck roll by

You know what? So do I!

And if you think a great big pile of trash is pretty

And that ice cream is yucchy as can be

If you can't stand a cuddly little kitty

And you'd like to chase her up the nearest tree

Then you can be pretty sure that you're a grouch like me