I sold your Rolex

To buy that gold Versace dress

I set free your whiny French poodle

So you can get your beauty rest



[Chorus:]

And I did it all for you

I did it all (I did it all) for you

This Christmas (This Christmas)

All your dreams (all your dreams)

Will come true



I put your mother on a Greyhound (You did what?)

You'd always hoped she'd have the chance to see the world (leave our mom alone)- now she can

I torched your Sports Illustrated swimsuit issues (no, no, no, no)

So I could be your only girl - and now I am



[Repeat Chorus]



[Bridge:]

How can I forget

All you've done for me, I'll get you yet

This is the season to give

But I can never forgive the damage that you've done

(Damage that you've done)

This must be love



I sank your bass boat (Not my bass boat, no, no, no)

So you'd have more time to spend with me

I hooked your grandma's diamond earrings

For the down payment on my SUV

(Fully loaded, heated seats, in hunter green-is this for me?)



[Repeat Chorus]