Walter and me, we've been courtin' for years

But he's never asked me to wed

When Leap Year comes round I give three hearty cheers

Hip-hip-hooray, hip-hip-hooray, hip-hip-hooray

As I do the askin' instead

I don't want to die an old maid

So I sing him this serenade:



Walter-er, Walter, lead me to the altar

I'll make a better man of you

Walter, Walter, buy the bricks and mortar

And we'll build a love nest for two

My bottom drawer's all packed and ready

My bridal gown's as good as new

Walter, Walter, lead me to the altar

And make all me nightmares come true



Walter, Walter, lead me to the altar

I don't cost much to keep in food

Walter-er, Walter, mother says you oughta

So take me while she's in the mood

You know I'm very fond of chickens

We'll raise a lovely little brood

Walter, Walter, lead me to the altar

And I'll show you where I'm tattooed



Walter, Walter, lead me to the altar

Don't say I've met me Waterloo

Walter, Walter, tears are tasting salter

And I've lost me handkerchief too

Don't muck the goods about no longer

My old age pension's nearly due

Walter, Walter, lead me to the altar

It's either the workhouse or you...



Oh dear, it is an all, it is an all

I'm gettin' older every day