'Twas the night before Christmas

And all through the trailer

Not a creature was stirrin'

'Cept a redneck named Taylor.



His first name was Bubba,

Joe was his middle,

And a-runnin' down his chin

Was a trickle of spittle.



His socks, they were hung

by the chimney with care,

And therefore there was

a foul stench in the air.



From out in the yard

There came such a noise

That Bubba got scared

And rousted the boys.



There was Rufus, 12;

Jim Bob was 11;

Dud goin' on 10;

Otis was 7.



John, George and Chucky

Were 5,4, and 3:

The twins were both girls

So they let them be.



They jumped in their overalls,

No need for a shirt,

Threw a hat on each head,

Then turned with a jerk.



They ran to the gun rack

That hung on the wall.

There were 17 shotguns;

They grabbed them all.



Bubba said to the young'uns,

"Now hesh up ya'll!

The last thing we wanna do

Is wake up yer Maw."



Maw was expecting

And needed her sleep,

So out they crept out the door

Without making a peep.



They all looked around,

and then they all spit.

The young'uns asked Bubba,

"Paw, what is it?"



Bubba just stared;

He could not say a word.

This was just like all of

The stories he'd heard.



It was Santy Claus on the roof,

Darn tootin'

But the boys didn't know;

They was about to start shootin'!



They aimed their shotguns

and nearly made a mistake

That would have resulted

in venison steak.



Bubba hollered out,

"Don't shoot, boys!"

That's Santy Claus

And he's brought us some toys.-acap