The man who preached the funeral

Said it really was a simple way to die ...

He laid down to rest one afternoon

And never opened up his eyes ...

They hired me and Fred and Joe

To dig the grave and carry up some chairs ...

It took us seven hours

And I guess we must have drunk a case of beer. ...



I guess I ought to go and watch them put 'im down

But I don't own a suit

And anyway when they start talkin' about

The fire in Hell, well, I get spooked

So, I'll just sit here in my truck

And act like I don't know 'im when they pass

Anyway, when they're all through

I've got to go to work and mow the grass.



Well, here they come and who's that

Ridin' in that big ol' shiny limousine

Mmh! look at all that chrome, I do believe

That that's the sharpest thing I've seen

That must belong to his great uncle

Someone said he owned a big ol' farm

When they get parked I'll mosey down

and look it over, that won't do no harm.



Well, that must be the widow in the car

And would you take a look at that

That sure is a pretty dress

You know some women do look good in black

Well, he's not even in the ground

And they say that his truck is up for sale

They say she took it pretty hard

But you can't tell too much behind the veil.



Well, listen ain't that pretty

When the bugler plays the Military