Afroman Talking]

Wait a minute man

Hey check this out man tell it

It was this blind man right, it was this blind man right

He was feelin' his way down the street with a stick right, hey

He walked past this fish market, you know what I'm sayin'

He stopped he took a deep breath he said

Snfffffff, woooo good morning ladies, ha

You like that shit man

Hey man I've got a gang of that shit man

Hey I'll tell you what

We'll all have a good time

We'll pull on the drug

And hey, hey if everybody crowd around the mike

I'll tell you all these motherfuckin' jokes I got

First I'm gonna start off like that, hey help me sing it homeboy



[Afroman Rapping]

Said colt 45 and two zigzags baby thats all we need

We can go to the park, after dark

Smoke that tumbleweed

As the marijuana burn we can take our turn

Singin' them dirty rap songs

Stop and hit the bong like Cheech and Chong

And sell tapes from here to Hong Kong

So roll, roll, roll my joint, pick out the seeds and stems

Feelin' high as hell flyin' through Palmdale

Skatin' on Dayton rims

So roll, roll, the '83 Cadillac Coupe Deville

If my tapes and my cds just don't sell, I bet my Caddy will



Well it was just sundown in small white town

They call it East Side Palmdale

When the afroman walked through the white land

Houses went up for sale

Well I was standing on the corner sellin' rap cds

When I met a little girl named Jan

I let her ride in my Caddy

Because I didnt know her daddy was the leader of the Ku Klux Klan

We fucked on the bed

Fucked on the floor

Fucked so long I grew a fuckin' afro

Then I fucked to the left (left)

Fucked to the right (right)

She sucked my dick 'til the shit turned white

Thought to myself sheeba-sheeba

Got my ass lookin' like a zebra

I put on my clothes and I was on my way

Until her daddy pulled up in a Chevrolet

And so I ran I jumped out the back window

But her daddy he was waitin' with a two-by-four

Oh, he beat me to the left

He beat me to the right

The motherfucker beat my ass all night

But I ain't mad at her prejudice dad

Thats the best damn pussy I ever had

Got a bag of weed and a bottle of water

I'm gonna fuck that bitch just one more time



Colt 45 and two zigzags baby thats all we need

We can go to the park, after dark

Smoke that tumbleweed

And as the marijuana burn we can take our turn

Singin' them dirty rap songs

Stop and hit the bong like Cheech and Chong

And sell tapes from here to Hong Kong

So roll, roll, roll my joint, pick out the seeds and stems

Feelin' high as hell flyin' through Palmdale

Skatin' on Dayton rims

So roll, roll, the '83 Cadillac Coupe Deville

If my tapes and my cds just don't sell, I bet my Caddy will



I met this lady in Hollywood

She had green hair but damn she looked good

I took her to my house because she was fine

But she whooped out a dick that was bigger than mine

I met this lady from Japan

Never made love with an African

I fucked her once, I fucked her twice

I ate that pussy like shrimp-fried rice

Don't be amazed at the stories I tell ya (tell ya)

I met a woman in the heart of Australia

Had a big butt and big titties too

So I hopped in her ass like Kangaroo

See I met this woman from Haw-AIEE

Stuck it in her ass and she said "AIEE"

Lips was breakfast, pussy was lunch

Then her titties busted open with Hawaiian Punch

I met Colonel Sanders wife in the state of Kentucky

She said I'd fry some chicken if you'd just fuck me

I came in her mouth, it was a crisis

I gave her my secret blend of Herbs' N' Spices



Colt 45 and two zigzags baby thats all we need

We can go to the park, after dark

Smoke that tumbleweed

And as the marijuana burn we can take our turn

Singin' them dirty rap songs

Stop and hit the bong like Cheech and Chong (hey wait a minute)

And sell tapes from here to Hong Kong



I met Dolly Parton in Tennessee

Her titties were filled with hennesey

That country music really drove me crazy

But I rode that ass and said yes Miss Daisy

Met this lady in Oklahoma

Put that pussy in a coma

Met this lady in Michigan

I can't wait 'til I fuck that bitch again

Met a real black girl down in South Carolina

Fucked her until she turned into a white albina

Fucked this hooker in Iowa

I fucked her on credit, so I owe her

Fucked this girl down in Georgia

Came in her mouth, man I thought I told ya

Met this beautiful sexy hoe

She just ran across the border of Mexico

Fine young thing said her names Maria

I wrapped her up just like a hot tortilla

I wanna get married but I can't afford it

I know I'm'a cry when she get deported



Colt 45 and two zigzags baby thats all we need

We can go to the park, after dark,

Smoke that tumbleweed

And as the marijuana burn we can take our turn

Singin' them dirty rap songs

Stop and hit the bong like Cheech and Chong

(hey wait a minute man, hey fuck that shit)

And sell tapes from here to Hong Kong



Have you ever went over a girls house to fuck

But the pussy just ain't no good

I mean you gettin' upset because you cant get her wet

Plus you in the wrong neighborhood

So you try to play it off and eat the pussy

But it take her so long to come

Then a dude walk in thats her big boyfriend

And he asks you where you from

So you wipe your mouth and you try to explain

You start talkin' real fast

But he already mad cause you fuckin' his wife

So he start beatin' on you ass

Now your clothes all muddy

Your nose all bloody

Your dick was hard but now its soft

You thought you had a girl to rock your world

Now you still gotta go jack off



[chorus] - until fade out