the humble and righteous and meek are teaching me whose will

to seek but who really knows how to speak about these things questions of where

can he go when he is feeling so low and kicking himself just to show how he

still bleeds and i want to know the difference between what sparkles and what

is gold i wonder how many eyes are fixed like a vultures on me now i wonder if

i can even move or breathe without disappointing someone and i know what they

call themselves but i don't remember inviting them to put me on this pedestal

and make me feel so naked afraid to look down afraid to turn around i bring it

on myself i know i bring it on myself and i want to know the difference between

what sparkles and what is gold i walked along beside the purple mountains

beneath the orange sky imagined what it all might look like with these planks

out of my eyes i wondered if the big white horse was coming down tonight i

wanted to taste that victory but my mouth was dry my mouth was dry

(there is only tonight and the light that bleeds from your heart makes me want

to try and start again).