We want Freddie for our leader

Freddie is a man of class

We want Freddie for our leader

All stand and raise your champagne glass



Gentlemen and assassins and ladies of the night

I call upon you this evening in the hope of shedding some light

I can't go into detail or finger unfounded fools

But there are some here amongst us that are not playing to the rules



I've rounded up the low-life and local CID

Offered a free massage or else the third degree

There is no simple solution in this life we lead

So make things easy for yourself to the baronage concede



We want Freddie for our leader

Freddie is a man of class

We want Freddie for our leader

All stand and raise your champagne glass



Peace shall not prevail in Purley came the stark warning today

From his hospital bed Drip-Fed Fred vowed he was here to stay

"I'll tell you something for nothing", he claimed, "Never in all my days

Have I felt so intimidated by the cheap tactics on display"



Ahh-ah-ah-ah

Ahh-ah-ah-ah



We want Freddie for our leader

Freddie is a man of class

We want Freddie for our leader

All stand and raise your champagne glass



And approaching the pulpit, the Right Honourable Reverend Greene

"We're gathered here this evening to pay our due respects

To Drip-Fed Fred who late last night fell out of his prison bed

We know the nonce behind it, who slipped the night PD - ooh

The word is out now without doubt you will answer to me"



Gentlemen and assassins and ladies of the night

I call upon you this evening in the hope of shedding new light

There is a simple solution, one called honour amongst thieves

So we'll take pity on your souls and only cap your knees



Ahh-ah-ah-ah

Ahh-ah-ah-