I WENT UP FOR MY INTERVIEW ON THE 4TH DAY OF JULY


THE PERSONNEL MAN HE QUESTIONED ME, UNTIL I
NEARLY CRIED

MADE ME FILL IN FORMS, UNTIL I SHOOK WITH FEAR

ABOUT THE COLOUR OF MY TOILET ROLL AND IF MY
COUSIN’S QUEER.

HERE’S YOUR GOLD WATCH AND THE SHACKLES FOR
YOUR CHAINS

AND YOUR PIECE OF PAPER, TO SAY YOU LEFT HERE
SANE

AND IF YOU’VE A SON WHO WANTS A GOOD CAREER

JUST GET HIM TO SIGN ON THE DOTTED LINE AND WORK
FOR 20 YEARS

HE ASKED ME HOW MANY JOBS I’D HAD BEFORE

HE NEARLY HAD A HEART ATTACK WHEN I ANSWERED FOUR


FOUR JOBS OF 20 YEARS OR MORE, THIS CAN NEVER BE

WE ONLY TAKE ON MEN, WHO WORK ON UNTIL THEY DIE

HERE’S YOUR GOLD WATCH AND THE SHACKLES FOR
YOUR CHAINS

AND YOUR PIECE OF PAPER, TO SAY YOU LEFT HERE
SANE

AND IF YOU’VE A SON WHO WANTS A GOOD CAREER

JUST GET HIM TO SIGN ON THE DOTTED LINE AND WORK
FOR 20 YEARS

HE TOOK ME OUTSIDE TO WHERE THE GRAVESTONES STAND
IN LINE

THIS IS WHERE WE BURY THEM, IN QUICKSTONE AND IN
LIME

AND IF YOU’RE GOING TO WORK FOR US, THIS YOU
MUST AGREE

THAT IF YOU’RE GOING TO DIE, PLEASE DO IT
DURING TEA – BREAK

HERE’S YOUR GOLD WATCH AND THE SHACKLES FOR
YOUR CHAINS

AND YOUR PIECE OF PAPER, TO SAY YOU LEFT HERE
SANE

AND IF YOU’VE A SON WHO WANTS A GOOD CAREER

JUST GET HIM TO SIGN ON THE DOTTED LINE AND WORK
FOR 20 YEARS

THIS STORY THAT YOU’VE HEAR, YOU MAY THINK
RATHER QUEER

BUT IT IS THE TRUTH YOU’LL BE SURPRISED TO HEAR


I DID NOT WANT SOME JOB UP ON THE BOARD

I JUST WANTED TO TAKE A BROOM AND SWEEP THE
BLOODY FLOOR. (CH)