You're having tea with Graham Greene

In a colored costume of your choice

And you'll be held in high esteem

If you're seen in between

Stiffly holding umbrellas

Catching the fellows making the toast

To the civil servant Carruthers

Making the others worser than most



You're making small talk now with the Queen

And the elegant ladies in waiting

You're very nervous they can all tell

Pretty well they can tell

So save yourselves for the hounds of hell

They can have you all to themselves

Since the fashion now is to give away

All the things you love so well



Welcome back to Chipping and Sodbury

You can have another chance

It must all seem like second nature

Chopping down the people where they stand

According to the latest score

Mr. Enoch Powell is falling star

So in future please bear in mind

Don't see clear don't see far

When the average social director

Mistook a passenger for the conductor

So shocking see the old Church of E

Looking down on you and me