If we crawl at two

We could crawl at twenty-two

And grovel at

The drop of a hat



And once they've got you down there

It's so hard to re-straighten your back

It we crawl at two

We could crawl at one handred and two



And the target brainless don't quite reach

Covered so kindly in your opening speech

Is a tiny crab of thought, crab of thought

On a sideways beach



Let lessons not the pupils teach

Justice not the lesers breach

And maggots not have fingers

Wagged at by leech



Well I made sure

I wrote this song in braille

So you could touch the words

The words that sail



From my mouth back to the jail

You could touch the words that sail

From the mouth back to the jail

That is posing as tongue



Curtsies, bows, thank you sirs

And the wearing of a business suit

Lead to complaints of backache

And end with a Nazi salute



And once they've got you down there

It's so hard to re-straighten your back

If we crawl at two

We could crawl at two two two



And the target brainless don't quite reach

Covered so kindly in your opening speech

Is a tiny crab of thought, crab of thought

On a sideways beach



Let lessons not the pupils teach

Justice not the lesers breach

And maggots not have fingers

Wagged at by leech



Well I made sure

I wrote this song in braille

So you could touch the words

The words that sail



From my mouth back to the jail

You could touch the words that sail

From the mouth back to the jail That is posing as tongue



If we crawl at two

We could crawl at twenty-two

If we crawl at two

We could crawl at twenty-two