Now everything you're telling me rips me up

I swear I wish I'd make myself shut you up

I've got a list here of things we talked about

The ugliness you see's just me inside out

And what I just don't know

Is what I think about it

I don't know at all

Don't you see that people

Will like you for who you are

'Cause like is like a sitcom, a senior prom

And I'm OK and you're OK

Grade A - 10-4 - roger - over and out

Listen up - check it out

There's something ugly inside of you

There's a big empty hole inside of you

There's something creepy crawling on your brain

There's something in you

It's red white and blue inside of you

As long as you don't have

Lots of zits or small tits

Or crooked teeth

Then you won't be a freak, a wildebeaste

And people won't tape signs onto your back

Or beat the crap out of you

Or ignore your sorry ass

See, there's something vapid inside of you

There's a sweet little robot inside of you

So take off that silly moustache

Don't be a baby

There's a Pete Brady inside of you

ONE: You act your age

TWO: You don't try to be something you're not

THREE: You find out in advance

What restaurant your mom and dad are going to

And go someplace else