Laura calls me in the middle of the night

Passes on her painful information

Then these careless fingers they get caught in her vice

Til they're bleeding on my coffee table



Living alone isn't all that it's cracked up to be

I'm on her side, why does she push the poison on me?



Laura has a very hard time

All her life has been one long disaster

Then she tells me she suddenly believes

She's seen a very good sign

She'll be taking some aggressive action



I fight her wars while she's slamming her doors in my face

Failure to break was the only mistake that she made



Here I am feeling like a fucking fool

Do I react the way exactly she intends me to?

Everytime I think I'm off the hook she makes me lose my cool

I'm her machine and she can punch all the keys

She can push any button I was programmed through



Laura calls me when she needs a good fix

All her questions will get sympathetic answers

I should be so immunized to all of her tricks

She's surviving on her second chances



Sometimes I feel like this godfather deal is all wrong

How can she hold an umbilical chord for so long?



I've done everything I canm, what else am I supposed to do

I'm her machine and she can punch all the keys

She can push any button I was programmed through



Laura loves me even if I don't care

That's my problem, that's her sacred absolution

If she had to she would put herself in my chair

Even though I faced electrocution



She always says I'm the best friend that she's ever had

How do you hang up on someone who needs you that bad?





Submitted by Michael Hack