Once slept with a black-haired lad

Went up his apartment

Pretty quickly, things turned bad

Passion wasnt his department

Too busy shoving poppers up his nose

to notice me

Took a chance with another

Frolicking in bed

But he couldnt get exited

Unless i help a pillow tightly over his head

Just your average boy next door

Well they say some day prince will come

Not holding my breath anymore

You gotta kiss some frogs

Youve heard that one before

Now ive kissed a lot of frogs

Am i better off than i was before

Sitting here alone chapped lips

Ive never been a slut

Though ive slept with more than a few

Maybe thats something that

I could aspire to

Theres a lotta people in this town

Who never seem to come to grips with

How they feel from the waist down

Well ive been reading the personals

There seems to be two kinds

Helpless romantics, or guys with

absolutely nothing on their minds

But the endless bump and grind

Living in a fishbowl

Here at the edge of the world

you cant go west forever

Or youll hit ocean bottom

Looking up from the Golden Gate

I cant see east of the Berkeley Hills

But some people wanna live in North Dakota

Maybe you can go far in Fargo