Marvin, I Love You"

Long ago, in another galaxy, there lived a gloomy robot. His name was

Marvin. He was getting old and a bit rusty, and nobody liked him. One

day, being very bored, he thought it would be a good idea to tidy up all

his old programs in his dusty old databank. There were tapes in there

that he hadn't played for years. Checking them through, he accidentally

pressed a wrong button and suddenly he heard:

"Marvin I love you

Marvin I love you"

Well, he was sure he hadn't heard that ever before, and he wasn't even

sure he'd heard it _that_ time; because being a bored and gloomy robot,

he hadn't really been listening. What was worse, he couldn't remember

what button he'd accidentally pressed. Anyway, he tried a few switches

at random and suddenly:

"Marvin I love you

Marvin I love you

Remember I'm programmed for you

I know we're worlds apart

Still you could break my heart

Loving you is all I can do"

Well he heard it that time alright, no doubt about it! Who was singing

these strange words? Was it another robot, or some strange lifeform from the

distant past, when he was a young robot and people still made the

occassional attempt to like him? He couldn't make it out at all. So he

pushed a few buttons again:

"Marvin I love you

Marvin I love you"

That was it.

"I've tried to contact (you) Marvin

I don't know why, but you never replied.

Perhaps one day you'll answer,

But until then I guess I'll keep on trying."

Chorus

"That does not compute," he thought miserably. But at least he knew

where to find it in his databank. From then on, he could play it

whenever he wanted, think about what he'd missed, and live... miserably

ever after.

Chorus