We've all heard of Rudolph and his shiny nose

And we all know Frosty whose made out of snow

But all of those stories seem kind of... gay

Cuz we all know who brightens up our holiday



Mr. Hankey the Christmas Poo

Small and brown he comes from you

Sit on the toilet here he comes

Squeeze him between your festive buns



A present from down below

Spreading joy with a