(Written by Ayers/Berry/Buck/Mills/Stipe)

Old Man Kensey wants to be a sign painter

First he's got to learn to read
He's gonna be a clown on TV
Flexes his elbow taunt and free
That's my folly, I believe
Drink up the lake Kensey's awake
That's my folly, that's my mistake

Old Man Kensey wants to be a goalie
First he's got to learn to count
He's gonna be a clown on a circus mount
Letters to be signed and dropped off
Kensey's going far
John, Bill and Ed, stand on your head
That's my folly, I'm ready to go

Old Man Kensey wants to be a dog catcher
First he's got to learn to stand
He's gonna be a clown in a marching band
Letters to be signed ransom greed
That's my folly, I believe
Drink up the lake, John, Bill and Ed,
That's my folly, that's my mistake
Kensey's awake, stand on your head
That's my folly, I'm ready to go