Who puts fifty tons of shit on the Foreign Office roof?

Who suffers from nine known diseases?

Who gets up in the morning when the sun comes up

And makes their beds, of paper clips, and bus tickets

All around their heads?

Who congregate around Trafalgar Square

Taking pot shots at the tourists?

Oh you've got to watch out

When you wander round the square in the morning

They're everywhere, they're everywhere



Here we have an honest man

A civil servant to boot

He lived high up in the Ministry

And when he wished to make a point

He knew just what to do

His window ledges were all covered in grease

I want them out of here



He said to me I want them gone

Because you see -- Oh don't you see

None of us are getting any younger

You've got to follow your nose

And if it tells you that you've got to go

Well that's because, they're everywhere,

They're everywhere



So we called in those men, those horrible men

And set them to work on the rooftops

You see their van is very plain

And I know they're too ashamed

To wear their by appointment badges anymore

Sometimes they use vaseline, sometimes they use the pill

I've often seen them with a gun

But as the years go by, old habits seem to die

And nowadays they knockatize them all

Oh you've got to watch out

As you wander round the square in the morning

They're everywhere, they're everywhere