I looked in the mirror

(What did you see looking at you?)

I saw a nine stone weakling

(What will you do?)

Dynamic Tension waiting for you?

Dynamic Tension make a man out of you

I opened my magazine

(What did you see?)

I saw Mr. France

(What did he have?)

A girl on each shoulder

(What else?)

And one in his pants

Dynamic Tension can do this for you

Dynamic Tension make a man out of

You you you you you

So our hero goes down to the beach

He's in real terrible shape

His chick's been seen with big Alex

That mother kicked sand in his face

Now let me tell you about Alex

He's got:

Hands like hams

Knees like trees

200 lbs

Of surfboard Hercules

Mr. Atlas won't you bring her on back to me

I lost my girl down by the beach

She's with Alex and she's out of reach

So please Mr. Atlas won't you bring her on back to me

I saw your body in an advert on T.V.

But what convinced me was your money back guarantee

Now I'm stronger than Alex

(Where is he now?)

He's left in disgrace

(Oh yeah?)

'Cos I took back my girlfriend

(Ha, ha, ha, ha)

And kicked sand in his face

(In his eyes, in his ears, in his nose)

Dynamic Tension waiting for you

Dynamic Tension make a man out of you

Dynamic Tension, Dynamic Tension

Dynamic Tension, Dynamic Tension