There won't be any presents this christmas

No goodies in your stocking

The milk and cookies that the children left out

Will be left untouched beside the sink

The reindeer will be staying in their pens this year

The elves haven't built any thing

'cause santa got arrested

Last christmas day



Police got calls on 911

About a red-suited man who weighed a ton

There was a clear trail of evidence pointing north

This was the seventh time it happened on december 24th



The mounties reached the north pole

They found it was outside their jurisdiction

They called up interpol, the finnish police

To facilitate the suspect's extradition

They knocked on the door of a well-marked shop

With a warrant for the owner's apprehension

Then santa got arrested

Christmas day



Santa was charged with b&e

His council advised he plead guilty

There was footage of the crime running on tv

And photographs of little children sitting on his knee



The judge expressed concern about the risk of recidivism

His sentence was commuted

He got a bond of nonassociation with the elves

And his reindeer licence was suspended

He says he's giving up all of his former life

And now he wants to be a dental assistant

'cause santa got arrested

Santa got arrested

Santa got arrested

Last christmas day