Im a seven-inch cowboy

With a tiny pair of six guns.

Fivell get you ten,

I betcha never seen one.

Well Im a seven inch cowboy

How do you be?

And Im used to people gawking and a-staring at me

But I wasnt always so gol-darned wee

Let me tell you my story,

You can listen for free.



For seven long years,

Now thats a year for every inch I stand

Ive traveled small and lonely down the byways of this giant land

Like a country western Lilliputian too afraid to stop

Im at the bottom of the food chain whereas I once was at the top.

I wandered on foot, my horse had done abandoned me

And every town I come tos like a terrible dream

The other cowboys mocked me and spit tobacco like meteors

Watching me dodge em and laughing at my small squeaky scream

I went to a saloon to get a drink

They wouldnt serve me

They stuffed me in a glass and slid me up and down the bar

And all the barroom women gathered round and had their way with me

They sang a song both cold and mean

Cause thats how women are,

They sang,



A man can pan for gold and strike it rich and be a millionaire

Or ride the rodeo and be the best one at it anywhere.

Drive a brand new car, be a movie star

Size is all that counts, and there you are.



And Im a seven-inch cowboy

With a tiny pair of six guns

Fivell get you ten

I bet you never seen one



(Yodeling)



Now as you can imagine, Id grown pretty bitter

(Although thats the only way in which I had grown)

And in that seventh year I finally found my transgressor,

The man who had shrunk me, the worst fiend Id ever known.

The mad Professor Mentley was his name and I drew near

I hopped upon his shoulder and I grabbed him by the ear

I held my little pistols up a