As a little boy i dreamed of playing rock and roll

Playing in stadiums with every ticket sold

Seven figure income from a six string guitar

Dating gorgeous women and drivin' custom cars

Then it happened when my record went gold

Now i'm thinking what'll i do when i get old?

Can't live forever as the king of rock

That's why i'm investing in some blue chip stock



I got sex, drugs, and rrsps

I'm a rock and roller with financial security

Sex, drugs and rrsps

I'm a guitar hero with mortgage equity.



I'm a modern rebel with a cause

I like finding loopholes in the new tax laws

My fans are reading 'bout me in the rolling stone

While i'm talking to my broker on the telephone.

On stage i run around like some animal

But all my money's in a compound annual

This life is dangerous but i don't care

'cause i got insurance on my guitar and my hair!



I got sex, drugs, and rrsps

I'm a rock and roller with financial security

Sex, drugs and rrsps

I'm a guitar hero with mortgage equity.



We used to be such a happy band..

Phil and nick and bob and stan

But phil choked on his vomit

And then nick choked on his vomit

And then stan choked on his vomit

And then so did bob.



What a bunch of idiots!



Their deaths sure meant an awful lot to me

'cause now i'm getting all their royalties

They would have spent them on women and booze

But me i got commodities that just can't lose!



I got sex, drugs, and rrsps

I'm a rock and roller with financial security

Sex, drugs and rrsps

I'm a guitar hero with mortgage equity.



I got sex, drugs, and rrsps

I'm a rock and roller with financial security

Sex, drugs and rrsps

I'm a guitar hero with mortgage equity.

I'm a guitar hero with mortgage equity.

I'm a guitar hero with mortgage equity!!!

Hey guys, i brought beer!



History is made by stupid people



Scott became famous for freezing to death in antarctica

Columbus made history thinking some island was india

General custer's a national hero for not knowing when to run

All of these men are famous

And they're also very dumb



History is made by stupid people

Clever people wouldn't even try

If you want a place in the history books

Then do something dumb before you die



Nobility are famous for no reason

Mary antoinette enjoyed her cake

She caused a revolution when she would not share

And her husband lost his head for that mistake



The hindenburg was a giant zepplin

Its makers made a minor oversight

Before they filled it up with explosive gas

They should have fixed the no-smoking light

'cause...



History is made by stupid people

Clever people wouldn't even try

If you want a place in the history books

Then do something dumb before you die



Tally-ho! tally-ho!

Our king and country's honour we will save!

Tally-ho! tally-ho!

We're marching into history and the grave!



So if your son and daughter seem too lazy

Sitting there watching bad tv

Just remember you should be quite grateful

At least they are not making history

'cause...



History is made by stupid people

Clever people wouldn't even try

If you want a place in the history books

Then do something dumb before you die

Yes...

Do something dumb before you die

Yes...

Do something dumb before you die


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