I'm Jimmy Pop here in a jiffy heat me up and add oil

I'm like a zit a wart a corn a cyst a festering boil

I get under your skin and I sebaceously form

I'm as deep as the plot to an amateur gay porn

Keep ya hungry for more like Bangladesh

Then I'll borg di borg do borg ya like the Swedish Chef

Cause I'm one of a kind and kind of hard to find

Kind of like an Injun without his fire water wine

I'm like Schneider one day at a time

I'm feeling like Bob Vila nailing up your behind

To my wall like Daniel-son does

I'm waxing on I'm waxing off I'm waxing just because

I get wired like a Western Union and I got to be me

And I got more balls than the daily lottery

Like hemorrhoidal itch yo you can't ignore me

Cause I'm more tongue and cheek than a lesbo orgy

And I don't give a damn if you don't like me

Cause' I don't like you cause you're not like me

Second verse is different from the first

I'm Jimmy Pop I am

Jimmity Jimmity Pop I am I am

See my name's not Hoover and I don't give a damn

And I got a different angle like a parallelogram

And you'll be all ears like a field of corn

I'll make you Dizzy like Gillespie as I toot my own horn

Like a No. 2 pencil I always got a point

You'll want to share it with friends like a poorly rolled joint

I'm Jimmy Pop y'all I'm Jimmy Pop y'all I'm an Alka Seltzer that's right you're a seagull

As I continue to expand your head is gonna burst

Leave a bad taste in your mouth like moldy Liverwurst

Like the Texas Chainsaw Massacre I'll get in your face

But then I'll brush you off like Aqua-Fresh toothpaste

Cause I'm letting off steam like a Chinese Laundromat

But I'm not a roll of Charmin so don't give me no crap

And I don't give a damn if you don't like me

Cause' I don't like you cause you're not like me

I hate a lot of whites and I hate a lot of blacks

I hate poopin' in public places but we all hate that

I hate lesbian feminists because they're all so damn ugly

I hate Spin Magazine cause they never ever plug me

I hate Regis and Kathie Lee

I hate every single movie by that midget Spike Lee

I hate people that think I care what they think

I hate people that think their ass don't stink

I hate Jon Bon Jovi but I hate his music more

I hate killing people because I hate to keep score

I hate you but you hate yourself too

I hate to be honest but I'd hate to be you

And I don't give a damn if you don't like me

Cause' I don't like you cause you're not like me