In the keep of Gwar much torment remained

Despite all the bodies hacked in twain

So many had died in the viscous campaign

That the femurs alone made a fine mountain



The master was no longer Gwar's sovereign

Of wealth and women they had none to gain

What goal was left for them to attain

So Oderus did call for conclave



First came Balsac his council was wise

His war axe gleamed he was a loyal knight

Plus forty dancing bears he did provide

Then, first in prowess he stood his lord beside



Beefcake the Mighty his ass was wide

Brought Eighty laden oxen, he was a good ally

Jizmak the Gusha, his legion was described

For many hours he barked at the tribe



But then, timely, the catering arrived

Booze, drugs, food, 400 mule loads high

Flattus Maximus this he did supply

And now the mighty brothers of Gwar did bind



They will to journey and slay without plan

Bring siege and terror to the cities of man

Open Oberammergau

Like hell was a womb, it tore



And from the wound the creatures pour

Troll, Goblin, Manticore

Siege machine and armored whore

there will be battle like never before



The surface world learned of the malice

Black Pope, ususrper, he saw through the veil

They plan their defense in the land of the wasted

Africa, bitter fruit she tasted



Ensign of industry, let it be raised

There the camp of the Black Pope was placed

his legions beneath, through the valleys they raced

Chariots they rode, their skulls were iron plated



Belching fire, freshly painted

8000 battalions of knights freshly sainted

But before the fought the were vaccinated

To protect them from the AIDS that had been created



To continue the reign of the Black Pope unabated

The people at home got a version G-Rated

Here Gwar invaded

Began the violation



The war barges, forecastles swarming

Disgorging the troops, formations forming

The low drone, of the horning

Sounding a call, then a warning



A nuclear salvo where Gwar was encroaching

Within a second ten legions were toasting

Balsac said "did iyou feel something"?

The lord was not boasting



The enemy is vast, steel carpets the terrain

Still they are forming armor detrains

They send forth a captain, OJ, by the name

Flattus struck him in the brain



Burst the helmet made two parts of the mind

chopped trough his gorget, through chest, into spine

And the good captians blood flowed like wine

Flattus said "so ends a cowards time"



Balsac is angry, he'll have no more

He hurls his axe with greater force

To smite Regis with terrible force

his sheild breaks, his hauberk unsews



The axe bursts through the chest and torso

Bright blood spurts, the guts are loosed by the throw

and with that axe the soul from body goes

Said Jizmak "that was a heavy blow"



Beefcake the Mighty dotted with spew

His sword falls skulls burst in two

The eyes burst from sockets, he is not through

Thousands of warriors he does this too



Piling up corpses of those he slew

until it was hard to tell if the pile grew

Balsac said "He is a princely lord"

Said Beefcake "yes it is true"



Jizmak smites, his hammer whirls

Foreheads explode, entrails whirl

Breaking open brain-pans as well

Red blood flowing as souls speed to hell



Oderus smites the Black Pope, exposing the brain

The blade continued through meat and membrane

Bright blood flowed in the grass where he was lain

There ends this tale, that much is plain