Destiny was calling

Monday afternoon

Wednesday you'll be crawling

And you'll pray to be there soon

With sports and wine





Some men never grew up

Fortunate like you

Some men never found out

What it takes to be a dude

That's Sports and Wine





The girls don't understand it

What you think is art

My oh my we're all impressed

How sensitive you are

Everybody's talkin' about you now

You know it's true

Always has been sports and wine for you





So you ask me how I think I know

Just what makes you tick

I know what I know y'know

I know you make me sick

Sports and wine





Girls don't understand it

Anything you say

I don't understand it either

Guess that makes me gay

Everybody's talking 'bout you now

You know it's true