including "The Marching Song of the Pollicle Dogs"



MUNKUSTRAP:

The Pekes and the Pollicles, as everyone knows.

Are proud and implacable passionate foes

It is always the same, wherever one goes

And the Pugs and the Poms, although most people say

That they do not like fighting, yet once in a way,

They will now and again join in to the fray



And they



CHORUS:

Bark bark bark bark

Bark bark BARK BARK!



MUNKUSTRAP:

Until you can hear them all over the park



Now on the occasion of which I shall speak

Almost nothing had happened for nearly a week

(And that's a long tome for a Pol or a Peke)

The big Police Dog was away from his beat--

I don't know the reason, but most people think

He'd slipped into the Wellington Arms for a drink--

And no one at all was about on the street

When a Peke and a Pollicle happened to meet

They did not advance, or exactly retreat,

But they glared at each other, and scraped their hind feet,



And started to



CHORUS:

Bark bark bark bark

Bark bark BARK BARK!



MUNKUSTRAP:

Until you could hear them all over the park



Now the Peke, although people may say what they please

Is no British Dog, but a heathen Chinese

And so all the Pekes, when they heard the uproar

Some came to the window, some came to the door

There were surely a dozen, more likely a score

And together they started to grumble and wheeze

In their huffery-snuffery heathen Chinese

But a terrible din is what Pollicles like

For your Pollicle Dog is a dour Yorkshire tyke,

And is braw Scottish cousins are snappers and biters,

And every dog-jack of them notable fighters;

And so they stepped out, with their pipers in order,

Playing When the Blue Bonnets Came Over the Border

Then the Pugs and the Poms held no longer aloof,

But some from the balcony, some from the roof,

Joined in to the din

With a



CHORUS:

Bark bark bark bark

Bark bark BARK BARK!



MUNKUSTRAP:

Until you could hear them all over the park



CHORUS:

There are dogs out of every nation,

The Irish, the Welsh and the Dane;

The Russian, the Dutch the Dalmatian,

And even from China and Spain;

The Poodle, the Pom, the Alsatian

And the mastiff who walks on a chain

And to those that are frisky and frollical

Let my meaning be perfectly plain;

That my name it is Little Tom Pollicle--

And you'd better not do it again



MUNKUSTRAP:

Now when these bold heroes together assembled,

The traffic all stopped, and the Underground trembled,

And some of the neighbors were so much afraid

That they started to ring up the Fire Brigade



When suddenly, up from a small basement flat,

Why who should stalk out but THE GREAT RUMPUSCAT!

His eyes were like fireballs fearfully blazing,

He gave a great yawn, and his jaws were amazing;

And when he looked through the bars of the area

You never saw anything fiercer or hairier

And what with the glare of his eyes and his yawning

The Pekes and the Pollicles quickly took warning

He looked at the sky and he gave a great leap--

And they every last one of them scattered like sheep



And when the Police Dog returned to his beat,

There wasn't a single one left in the street