"this book deals with epiphenomenalism, which has to do with consciousness as a mere accessory of physiological processes whose presence or absence... makes no difference... whatever are yo

Ng?"



Aphra benn: hello

Cervantes: donkey

Daniel defoe: to christen the day!

Samuel richardson: hello

Henry fielding: tittle-tattle tittle-tattle...

Lawrence sterne: hello

Mary wolstencraft: vindicated!

Jane austen: here i am!

Sir walter scott: we're all doomed!

Leo tolstoy: yes!

Honor de balzac: oui...

Edgar allen poe: aaaarrrggghhhh!

Charlotte brontë: hello...

Emily brontë: hello...

Anne brontë: hellooo..?

Nikolai gogol: vas chi

Gustav flaubert: oui

William makepeace thackeray: call me 'william makepeace thackeray'

Nathaniel hawthorne: the letter 'a'

Herman melville: ahoy there!

Charles dickens: london is so beautiful this time of year...

Anthony trollope: good-good-good-good evening!

Fyodor dostoevsky: here come the sleepers...

Mark twain: i can't even spell 'mississippi'!

George eliot: george reads german

Emile zola: j'accuse

Henry james: howdy miss wharton!

Thomas hardy: ooo-arrr!

Joseph conrad: i'm a bloody boring writer...

Katherine mansfield: [cough cough]

Edith wharton: well hello, mr james!

Dh lawrence: never heard of it

Em forster: never heard of it!



Happy the man, and happy he alone who in all honesty can call today his own;

He who has life and strength enough to say 'yesterday's dead & gone - i want to live today'



James joyce: hello there!

Virginia woolf: i'm losing my mind!

Marcel proust: je me'en souviens plus

F scott fitzgerald: baa bababa baa

Ernest hemingway: i forgot the....

Hermann hesse: oh es ist alle so häßlich

Evelyn waugh: whoooaarr!

William faulkner: tu connait william faulkner?

Anaïs nin: the strand of pearls

Ford maddox ford: any colour, as long as it's black!

Jean-paul sartre: let's go to the dome, simone!

Simone de beauvoir: c'est exact present

Albert camus: the beach... the beach

Franz kafka: what do you want from me?!

Thomas mann: mam

Graham greene: call me 'pinky', lovely

Jack kerouac: me car's broken down...

William s burroughs: wowwww!



Happy the man, and happy he alone who in all honesty can call today his own;

He who has life and strength enough to say 'yesterday's dead & gone - i want to live today'



Kingsley amis: [cough]

Doris lessing: i hate men!

Vladimir nabokov: hello, little girl...

William golding: achtung busby!

Jg ballard: instrument binnacle

Richard brautigan: how are you doing?

Milan kundera: i don't do interviews

Ivy compton burnett: hello...

Paul theroux: have a nice day!

Gnter grass: i've found snails!

Gore vidal: oh, it makes me mad!

John updike: run rabbit, run rabbit, run, run, run...

Kazuro ishiguro: ah so, old chap!

Malcolm bradbury: stroke john steinbeck, stroke jd salinger

Iain banks: too orangey for crows!

As byatt: nine tenths of the law, you know...

Martin amis: [burp]

Brett easton ellis: aaaaarrrggghhh!

Umberto eco: i don't understand this either...

Gabriel garcia marquez: mi casa es su casa

Roddy doyle: ha ha ha!

Salman rushdie: names will live forever...