I cannot pretend

That I remember how to dream

And no one told me

That when I became a man

The monsters would still be under the bed

And the strangers would still seem so strange

And the darkness would still incite fear

Inside me



And in knowing this

And retrieving this

Give my heart away

Give my heart away

To every single

Kiss like lemonade

It brings me to my knees

Looking down on this place



The closest thing to a christ in this world

Is the fact that I've lived long enough to regret

All the time that I've spent simply wishing away

All the things I will live to regret



There is no light at the end of this tunnel

There is no grasping a waning salvation

There is no never as no love lasts forever

In spite of what you may have heard

In spite of what you may have been taught:



Weened off of mother's breast

Forced into our still-soft mouths

Are constant lies

Are constant lies

Dismember my idealism

Before my eyes

Recognize the truth behind

The blind leading the blind



Trying to feel out my way through this mayhem

This crippled reflection of what was once my life

Bleeding-hand image of what I'm becoming

Can this disaster

Oh, can this disaster be felt?



I cannot pretend